DURING Carers Week (June 10 to 16), a lady from Okehampton shared her experience of caring for her husband who has dementia, the difference made by local dementia day care group The Filo Project, and what she hopes the next government will do to support family carers.

Former social work manager Jenny Edwards, 73, cares for her husband David, 83, a former nursing officer who lives with vascular dementia. She explains: “David was diagnosed five-and-a-half years ago with vascular dementia.

“He’s still got great humour and on good days you might not be able to tell he has dementia. But he can’t be left unsupervised as he still tries to do things that aren’t safe without someone around – for example, he’ll try to make a cup of tea, but he wouldn’t be safe with the kettle. He also wanders around in the night, sometimes four to five times a night.

“I love him to bits and he’s still my husband, but I’ve lost him. That’s the thing with dementia, it’s a gradual loss of the person and what you once had with them.

“I’m lucky to have support around me. There are others who have much less but I’m emotionally, physically and mentally exhausted and I’m looking into respite care for myself now even though we’re getting to our limit of what we can afford.”

David attends The Filo Project, which aims to feel like a relaxed day spent with friends. Hosts collect small groups of clients and drive them to their home for a shared, joyful day and home-cooked lunch. The day is not prescriptive and activities flex to each group’s interests and abilities, such as baking, jigsaws, singing or crafting.

The more intimate setting allows people to grow in confidence, make friends and reduce their risk of physical and mental health issues associated with isolation. Meanwhile, family carers have regular, extended respite from the challenges of looking after a loved one with dementia.

Jenny added: “David has been going to host Julia’s house once a week for the last three years and enjoys going very much. He’s developed a love of peeling vegetables and helping make lunch, so their home-cooked lunches often involve potatoes or carrots! It’s a close-knit group with lots of talking. They might do a quiz or sit in the garden and talk about the flowers.  

“For me, The Filo Project is excellent at keeping David socially active and keeping his brain working as long as possible. He’s in a homely atmosphere where he feels comfortable, it’s not like there are twenty people sitting around a table in a community centre.”

To find out more about The Filo Project visit www.thefiloproject.co.uk or call 0333 939 8225.